Malti Jones

Today's post is about Malti Jones.  Malti Jones is the girl who lives under my bed. She often makes strange cawing  sounds at 2 in the morning, but I have learned to ignore them.  Oh, and she sings Lord of the Rings songs to me while I drift away peacefully to sleep.  On occasion she has tried to bite me with her alarmingly long fangs, but she generally fails.  We also watch the L Word and have wall sex.  Long story.  Not actually involving sex.  Shane (a character on the L Word) is the only girl in the world I would ever sleep with.  Sorry to all the other women out there, but it's just not gonna happen.  Get over it.  Anyways, Malti Jones.  We have many random escapades, including dressing up as men and skateboarding down the hall.  Well, not so much skateboarding as me standing on the board with Malti pulling me down the hall.  But same diff.  We also stood outside the elevator with Nerf guns and bombarded the girls on our floor when the door opened.  And had a duel in the hallway, complete with costumes and mustaches.  Basically, we're the shit.  End of story.  I may elaborate later but I don't feel like it right now.